Author: casey

hot choc-o-late a lot

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Hot Chocoltae

It’s been a pretty cold winter, especially for someone who has spent the past 4 out of 5 winters in kind of (Vegas) and really (Delray Beach, FL) warm places. And since my usual Iced Green Tea from Starbucks isn’t cutting it during these freezing nights and snowstorms, I’ve had to switch things up for the cold months.

But I despise everything about coffee – but mostly the debilitating anxiety attack that comes on about 15 minutes after sipping a cup – I have been really getting into Hot Chocolate this year. Which is weird because I really hate sweets and don’t like to eat anything with that much sugar. But I’m cold and in survival mode! And whatever.

It’s only been for the past few weeks, but I keep craving the creamy, rich taste and it doesn’t hurt that holding a piping hot beverage doubles as a hand warmer. The temperatures have been in the teens; I need all the help I can get.

So I’ve been on the hunt for my most favorite Hot Chocolate, and have come up with a few:

  • Magnolia Bakery – Duh, it’s Magnolia. They rule at anything sweet.
  • Le Pain Quotidien – This one if for when I’m feeling like I don’t want to be too “bad” by pounding a huge cup of chocolate because, you know, it’s organic and fair-trade, or whatever.
  • Sweet Corner Bake Shop – This adorable little neighborhood spot is on my corner, and is the biggest culprit in aiding in my newfound obesssion. It’s the right amount of sweet and creamy, and the temperature if always just-right – for finishing it in basically one sip, that is.
  • City Bakery – This place is a gem, and it’s 2 blocks from my office so…But for real, they serve up a Hot Chocolate so rich, I sometimes feel like I can’t finish it. I do, though. Waste not, want not.

I’m sure there are a thousand more perfect Hot Cocoas just waiting for my approval. No fear – I will be on the hunt.

 

 

new year. happy.

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Somehow, 2013 is over.

I don’t get it. It was the fastest year of my life, I think. Partly because I was having fun, partly because I was working 7 days a week, nonstop.

I’ve been back in NYC for just over 3 months now, and while things are completely different than they were before I left, it’s been fun – and also hard.

I’m reconnecting with old friends but finding that a lot of the people I spent time with the most aren’t around any more – kids, new cities, different lifestyles. And that’s ok. But it’s still strange. I go to a lot of my old hangouts but realize I didn’t necessarily like the bar or restaurant but rather the people I was there with. I’m also in a very different place and the things I really really cared about before I moved to Las Vegas for a year don’t carry the same weight. I’m changing (growing up?) and learning to accept it. But this isn’t time to sulk, because life is awesome. But realistic. So I am making new memories while sometimes missing the old ones.

And now it’s 2014 – another year, another fresh start. But I hate resolutions. I like to try to make changes all the time, let go of anything that doesn’t serve me, eat healthier, visit my grandma, do more yoga, write more, dress less vodka. Sometimes I succeed; often I don’t.

But it’s all good. I’m happy. Things are happening. And while the constant uncertainty in my life can be a cause of anxiety, it’s more often just exciting.

What I do know is that – as always – there are a lot of new things happening in my life – things that will take me to new places, meet new people and try new things.

And despite being back in NYC for the freezing cold winter (what was I thinking?) I am truly loving connecting with my favorite city on the world. I’m not sure what is next, but the adventure of life is my favorite part.

I’m looking forward to it all.

left coast living

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One of my favorite parts about living in Las Vegas was Los Angeles. And while I didn’t go amazingly often, I just liked having it nearby.

Being from New York, it was always kind of a given: I had to be anti-LA. I had trained myself to think it was shallow and full of wannabe whatevers and void of culture and excitement. And the traffic! I had never sat in it, but got enraged just thinking about it! Continue reading →

and just like that…

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It’s been just over 2 months since I packed up my life in Las Vegas and moved back home to New York City. When it finally all happened, it seemed very sudden – I resigned  from my job and was living back on the East Coast within two weeks.

But in reality, the end of my Sin City adventure had been a long time coming. Without getting into details, it was basically an unsustainable situation from the start – the job, the lifestyle, the inability for me to build any semblance of a normal routine. I was pulling all-nighters like a college student and drinking at least 7 nights – and multiple days – a week. I popped in for the occasional yoga class, and read about 1 in every 5 issues of the New Yorker. I just felt unsettled often. Continue reading →

lightening up

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Casey moving

After selling the NYC apartment, I felt like a weight had been lifted. Not only was I no longer paying for it but I didn’t have to deal with it mentally or emotionally any more. I thought I would be devastated but I was actually thrilled. I even took a quick weekend trip to the East Coast and didn’t even do a walk-by.

It was official: I had let go.

A week later, my lease in Vegas was up, too. Talk about crazy timing… Continue reading →

taking a big step

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Apt

When I bought my studio apartment in Greenwich Village in 2005, it was meant to be a “starter” apartment. I got a 5-year ARM and figured I’d move on the greener – or at least spacier – pastures long before that term expired.

I was wrong.

Three boyfriends, one (now ex) husband, two dogs and eight years later, I moved across the country – but was still holding on to my little piece of downtown Manhattan. Continue reading →

Age Ain’t Nothing But…

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Last year at Lure

This year, I celebrated a big birthday. And while I’ve never cared much about getting older (I mean, I still drink straight out of the tequila bottle and dance on banquettes – not necessarily acting “my age” anyway) the weeks leading up to 35 were, well, um, shaky.

While visiting NYC at the end of April, I had planned a big blowout bash at the rooftop of a midtown hotel and sent out the requisite Facebook evite. It was all arranged and I was excited to come back home to celebrate. But as always, work got busy and I wasn’t able to make it back for my milestone occasion. Continue reading →

#nycwannabe

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“Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery”

NY wannabe

 

I constantly see places named in honor of NYC in every city I’ve lived in or visited. I get it, of course. Manhattan is dope. But still, it makes me laugh…and take a photo. Not quite sure that my hometown is known for its cabinetry but whatever.

saying goodbye

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Tattoo3tattoo2

I got my first tattoo over 11 years ago – and I’ve been dying to get it removed for about 10 1/2.

It happened when I was 23. Justin, my boyfriend at the time, was covered in ink – sleeves, chest, the works. I was so completely attracted to it.

So one day, after a couple of glasses of red wine at Patsy’s, we headed to Rising Dragon tattoo parlour then located at the Chelsea Hotel. It felt right. Being a lifelong New Yorker, getting a tattoo at the Chelsea Hotel seemed like the best idea ever. My artist Carlos Alfonso (AKA CFUS) was super sweet and talented.

While Justin had super artistic work that had a lot of thought put into it, I had no clue what to get. However, like many girls my age at that time, I knew exactly where I was putting this new brand – my lower back, of course. Yes, a tramp stamp.

Even though this was something that was going to be on my body forever, I chose a tribal pattern out of a book in about 30 seconds. Considering Justin’s knowledge and experience with this, I still sometimes wonder why he allowed it. But I was beyond excited with my choice.

I sat through the pain and was thrilled at how it came out. But soon after, I started to regret it. I would catch a glimpse in the mirror and a feeling of horror would come over me: this was permanent. It was years before I even seriously considered going through tattoo removal but it crossed my mind soon after that session.

Then I got a second one, on my wrist. It was symbolic and meant something very meaningful at the time, once again having to do with a boy. It was not a drunken, hasty decision. Plus, a tiny black star on teh wrist isn’t really bothering anyone.

The third piece of body art came in 2009, immediately following my wedding. My ex and I wanted to get our wedding rings inscribed but I opted for an all-diamond band, making that impossible. So we got ourselves inscribed with matching art instead. Even as we were going through our split, I never had any intention of removing it. It was a part of me, a symbol of my past.

tattooThings have changed. The marriage is long over and I am entering my mid-30’s. Since the tribal tramp stamp was on my lower back, I rarely ever saw it. But for the past few years, I have found myself growing increasingly insecure about it and looking into the process. At the beach, I tried wearing bikini bottoms that were perfectly placed to hide it. At one point, I thought my ex mother-in-law was going to have a heart attack over it. And guys I dated were constantly making comments – some liked it (ironically) while others offered to pay for its removal.

I should have taken them up on it, because after years of wanting to do it I am now shelling out triple of what it cost to get the tattoos to remove them. Yes, the tribal stamp and the marriage ink are finally saying goodbye. It will take a while – about 6 to 8 sessions – but I’ve set the wheels in motions and there is no turning back now. I really only wanted to remove the lower back ink but when the tattoo remover at Serenity Tattoo Removal offered to do them both for the same price, I couldn’t resist. It’s time to finally let go.

It is the most painful thing I have ever felt. It hurts way more than getting the work done. I couldn’t touch the burnt skin for days and it felt like it was melting off. But I feel like I am finally cleaning the slate and letting go of things that no longer serve me, and for that the pain is worth it.